Soft Grudge

by Mulligrub



Mulligrub is Kelly Campbell (guitar + vocals), J Riley Hill (drums + sometimes vocals), and Mirella Villa (bass). We live in Winnipeg.


released June 7, 2017

Recorded, mixed, and mastered by J Riley Hill of Mortfell Recording at Private Ear studios in 2015 and 2016.

Album art & design by Kelly.

Released independently April 23 2016.

Rereleased via Funeral Sounds (FSR046) in June 2017.



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Track Name: Canadian Classic
Backyard baby take me back
put your cigarettes out on my hands and
kiss me with your elbows up
make me flowers from empties and car exhaust

And melted plastic cups
will fold into the lawn
I will solder my mouth shut
with the heat from the sidewalk

kick your fires higher and put
holes in all your shirts
and when two thread's all you got left
swear you're not naked
must be another word

and I
won't walk home like this
so put your leeches on my lips
and when the bad blood's sucked out
of the bruises
salt them watch them fall off
do you know how to keep a secret?
Track Name: Chicken
We sit
on the sidewalk
that soldered my mouth shut
and I pet your dog

you say
I could hit you if I want I say
it's too late besides I don't think I would stop

she licks
my face with her big tongue
I wanna ask you does she still pull when she walks

you stare
out at the intersection
I won't answer a single question
it's not my fault

go home cry into your pillow
I'm so tired won't feel better tomorrow
tell all your friends that you're a better person
cry into their shoulders like it makes a difference
ask yourself who is it are you really trying to convince

wake up put on your shoes and walk the dog
when you go to feed her she looks up

asks you what is wrong and was it me
Track Name: NFLD
Six hour ferry stowaway I woke you up for snoring
and you couldn't get back to sleep and I'm sorry

Cut off shorts cut off our sleeves
popsicles light through green leaves
above the lakes with tiny
frogs to cup and hold in your hand

stub our toes run down the cliff
pitch the tents go for a swim
a bonfire all night you spend
building and the flames reflect
off the cove
in the morning we throw
the logs in and go

on the rocks
we watch the whales shoal
I've never been and may never again
be so close
to something so
complete and beautiful
and if the undertow should take me
I won't panic and I won't scream
just watch the rocks destroy my body
and watch the parts become part of something
greater than I could ever conceive
Track Name: Mountains & Houses
slept through the mountains hanging your head
the suburbs stare at you over the fence
watch from the car passing cigarettes
silent and destructively complacent
we sing

there's nothing I can do to stop
one thousand wonder bread trucks
from dumbing down and pumping up
with whitewashed marshmallow fluff

run your mouth into the ground
dig yourself a hole I hope you never get out
the edge at the top is lined with teeth they see
you don't practice what you preach you keep
secrets from your mother from your significant other and they sing

there's pills that you can take to stop
a thousand misfired neurons
from grinding you down building up
a mountain of molehill problems

build an overpass
for the family cat
one day she'll be all that's left
mow the newly flattened lawn
in front of an ancient mountain
ignore what we destroy until it's gone
until it's gone
Track Name: Europe
Step down off the bus
In front of my parents house, the wet grass must
Have soaked through your shoes and your socks
Your t-shirt's see through
And I would kiss you but I better I better not

I'm a marionette can't hold up my head
In a bar or a leopard print cocktail dress
Sneaking to the bathroom to shotgun a lucky seven
We walked there and we walked home

The river looks like a rainbow tonight
I could walk on it you look terrified and you tell me not to try
I said don't worry buddy I'm not that high
Don't worry buddy both our cell phones died

I passed out twice in Vimy Ridge park
You helped me up you helped me find my glasses
I was scared I missed work and you thought that I had died
When I asked you the time you said that's not important

You held my arm
As the sun came up
We jaywalked home
While healthy people, morning people passed us
Walking with their dogs, jogging with their dogs

And where are you now?
You're getting drunk in Europe.
You're fucking up your last chance
To get back the home the friends the family you abandoned
Well you're not gonna change
And there ain't no one that can make ya
So I'll walk home alone
and you keep being a rapist
cause you won't change you won't let it in
past your thick skull to your empty head
we wanted so bad to take you back
Track Name: Homo Milk
glowy stars from the dollar store
homogenized milk you can barely afford
and a closed door
Track Name: Man in the Moon
almost an entire year
over or under sleeping next to you here
on a ripped and stained bare mattress
unfurling thread blue flower black mould
perched on a loft bed built for us by a good friend
with stolen nails and a couple dirty pallets

I promise I won't take any of the sickness with me when I go
but don't beat yourself up if you come crawling back in the fall

I don't know if you will be around to write sad poems for me
I don't know if I will be around to sing you to sleep
I don't know if codependency is really all that healthy
the only thing that I know right now is I miss you already
Track Name: Song About the Man
disclaimer: I wrote this when I was 18 and am somewhat embarrassed of the lyrics :-P

it's anonymous ugly and shameful a distasteful joke in a room of staring people
you thought that you saw a rainbow but it was skyscraper staring at you from a puddle
and I don't get it either but I'm still offended
billboards big box stores highways never end
it seems one square of land will not remain sacred
someone has to own it and sell it and pave it
and have the nerve to say this

is the way its supposed to be the natural order of things
born to die in buildings built from drywall and wrapped in plastic siding
while blistered hands and bleeding feet
paint the walls of the elite
a pretty pink you can't see without rose glasses
blinders we hand down to our babies

it's always been about the money
finding new ways to hide lie and disguise
exporting overseas ugliness and poverty
when you slam the door say that's just my job
say that's just the law
but you founded the company and passed out the guns
Track Name: Anyways However
When I met you, you were scared of everything except dying
I kissed you on the Commons cause there was fire trucks in front of that big apartment building
down the street from ours
and on your skateboard
you rode into the harbour
I saw you leave but you didn't see me
coming home

We were two very unhealthy people
seems like all we did back then was cry on each other's shoulders
when the tears dried up it would get a little awkward
it's a miracle somewhere in there we found we held some common ground

and I want you around
wanna put christmas lights on the boat house
we'll never take them down
just watch them burn out

bleeh blooh blah bleeh blooh blah blah
when I kissed you in the backyard don't think about before or after
because I can never let go
you can never hold onto
anything that you don't keep in
I always gotta say what I think so

come over here
with your paper flowers, your mismatched socks, and your smile from ear to ear
I know you tried real hard
but you broke broke broke broke broke broke broke broke broke broke broke my heart

but it doesn't matter
cause i'll love you anyways and however
Track Name: Sprite Zero
aspartame and anxiety medication
shaky summer hungover repetitive motion
all night party last to leave 6:30AM and I can't sleep
drunk bike ride to clear my mind the sun comes up and I pass out just fine

in photographs your skin's pockmarked overexposed
by a lake in the sun
you stand up in front of me take off your clothes
turn around and run
into the water, and lined up on the pier
they watch you like seagulls you don't notice or care
I wish I could get it all right it's too much
you're a light bug and I can't keep up

I would like to steal a car
a blue station wagon like we had in 2011 and ride
on the roof through the woods at night
with the moon and the star that my dad
bought for my grandma before she died
your yellow graffiti on green highway signs
is a movie that I have seen
a million times too many